Prayer Changes Me

“I pray because I can’t help myself. I pray because I’m helpless. I pray because the need flows out of me all the time – waking and sleeping. It doesn’t change God – it changes me.” C.S. Lewis

One of my blogging friends, Theresa Moore, posted this quote on Facebook the other day and it really stuck with me. C.S. Lewis was such a brilliant man and has such a wonderful way of explaining faith and related matters.

I especially can relate to the last part of the quote: “It doesn’t change God – it changes me.” That is so true. God does not change. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. But by spending time with Him in prayer I am changed to be more like Him each day. As I pray for the ability to see me as He sees me – both as I am and as He desires me to be – I grow in faith and understanding. I cannot help but be changed by this process.

I have found another thing about prayer. Jesus said that we should pray for our enemies and for those who persecute us. When we do this, our tendency is to pray that God would change them. But prayer seldom changes the difficult people in our lives (though on occasion it can). What prayer for our enemies does is change our attitude towards them. When I earnestly pray for the difficult people in my life, God helps me to see them from His perspective and to understand a little better why they might be the way they are and the root of their difficult behavior.

Prayer doesn’t change my enemies – it changes me. It helps me gain the wisdom and compassion necessary to love them as God has called me to do. And when I love them, perhaps I might help them to change, too.

Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary:

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Romans 12:19-21 (NIV).

The Transforming Power of Our Invisible God

I think I mentioned last week that I bought a new (to me) Trevor Morgan CD at the Third Day concert. The name of the CD is Wonderlight and it was released in 2004, but I have been listening to it for the first time all this past week. It is an awesome CD. Trevor’s voice is beautiful and the music is uplifting and encouraging.

I have been wanting to share a few of the songs on the CD, but I couldn’t find any of them on YouTube. Finally on Saturday I decided to see if I could figure out how to make my own video using photos on my computer and the mp3 of one of my favorite songs on the CD that I had ripped to put on my iPod.

(Note: I do almost all of my iPod music that way so that if something happens to the digital file I still have the music on CD and can just rip it again. It’s old school, I know, but I’ve lost music that I had in only digital format before and had to repurchase it, which I did by buying the CD.)

Anyway, I was successful in creating my first music video with pictures and posting it to my YouTube channel. So here it is – it’s a song called Awakening.

Update: Apparently my video said it was pulled from YouTube by WMG if you clicked on the embedded video. So if you want to hear it you’ll have to click on this link and go to YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3k3KH_rLbY. And here are the lyrics (first verse and chorus), which are so awesome.

Waking me from my sleep
Bringing me to my knees
I know it sounds crazy
I know it sounds crazy
Reaching into my soul
Burning me like coals
I know it’s amazing
Yeah, it’s so amazing

I know I’m not the man I used to be
But it’s still a mystery
How something I can’t see is changing me

I love this song because it is a reminder that I am not the person I once was. God has changed me in ways I could never have accomplished on my own. I know because for years I tried and failed.

I can’t see God with my eyes, but I know He is there by the eyes of my heart and by the evidence of what He has done in and through me.

It’s a mystery – I don’t know how it happens – but the living God dwelling in the heart of a believer can turn sinner to saint and wash away the stain of all our sin. The transforming power of our invisible but ever-present God is amazing to see and experience.

If you have not experienced this mystery, if you are still trying (unsuccessfully) to change yourself for the better before you think God will even give you the time of day, take heart. Our God is in the business of befriending sinners and transforming them into His image.

Make Me Somewhat Better?

Last week I was driving my son to youth group and me to a Board of Elders meeting. We were listening to Third Day’s Revelation CD in the car. The song “This Is Who I Am” came on and my son said something that at first made me laugh, but then it got me thinking.

The chorus to this song says:

This is who I am
This is who I am
So take me and make me something so much more
This is who I am
This is who I am
So change me and make me someone better than before

Now, I’m not completely sure whether my son truly misheard the lyrics or was trying to be funny (because he is known for his off-the-wall sense of humor). Right after the chorus played he said, in his typical 16-year-old sarcastic voice, “Oh that’s a great thing to say. Okay, God, change me but don’t change me too much. Just make me ‘somewhat’ better than before.”

As I said, my first reaction was to laugh. But as I drove home later (my meeting having gone much later than his youth group gathering), I listened to the song again and was a little sad because it occurred to me that many Christians do say that very thing to God. They don’t mind if God changes them a little, but they don’t really want any big changes. They say to God, “Make me somewhat better.”

I think one reason for this is because many people think they are pretty good already. They go to church on Sunday, they don’t steal or cheat, and they’ve never murdered anyone. They think there really isn’t much need for significant improvement. They like the status quo. It’s comfortable and familiar.

But God doesn’t want to just make a few minor adjustments. He doesn’t want to make us just “somewhat” better. He wants to remake us in His image, to be and love like Christ. As Paul wrote to the Corinthians: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIV).

In my little town, there is a mix of small older houses and new mansions. We actually have a very large house that was just built across the street from us. There used to be a nice little 968 square foot cottage on that lot, and I’ve often wondered why they didn’t just add onto or remodel that house. After all, that’s what we did with our house; we remodeled and added on. From the street you can hardly tell the house is any bigger or different.

But that’s not what the developer who bought the cottage across the street did. He tore down the cottage and has replaced it with a 5 bedroom, 3 ½ bath house. God is a lot like that developer. He does not want to work in us the equivalent of a small remodel or even an addition. He wants to tear down the old house and build an entirely new one.

So how about you? You know who you are now; are you ready for God to make a complete change? Or are you asking Him to just make you somewhat better? Do you want what He does in you to be barely noticeable from the outside? Or do you want people to wonder whether you are even the same person they used to know?

Oh, and here’s a video of the song by Third Day. If you can’t help but hear the lyrics as “somewhat” instead of “someone,” I apologize. But just maybe it will help you remember what God wants to do with your life and mine.

Music Monday Extra – One Trick Pony

I love this song by MercyMe. It’s on the same CD as “So Long Self” that I featured in my post this morning. I actually wrote a post based on this song, “One Trick Pony,” last year before I knew how to insert videos or video links into my posts. That post was called “Faith: the Miracle of the Open-Minded.”

One of my favorite lines is, “Call me hard-headed for the One who changed me.” I’ve heard of people who say they were Christians but now they aren’t. I just can’t imagine that. If you truly believe and put all your trust in Jesus, He changes you in such a way that you can never go back to the selfish life you once lived.

The other great thing about this song is that it just makes me want to dance with joy. I hope it makes you want to dance for Jesus, too!

Easter Is Over. Now What?

Lent is over. Good Friday is history. Easter has come and gone. Now what? If I was one of the original apostles meeting with Jesus after His resurrection, my next move would have been to wait.

Once when he was eating with them, he commanded them, “Do not leave Jerusalem until the Father sends you the gift he promised, as I told you before. John baptized with water, but in just a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.” Acts 1:4-5 (NLT).

But I don’t have to wait for the Holy Spirit. He already dwells in me and has from the moment I believed that Jesus died for my sins and claimed Him as my Savior.

Pondering the journey of Lent, through the agony of seeing Jesus on the cross, and joy of His resurrection, I still have to ask myself, “Now what?” If faith in Christ doesn’t change anything about how I think and live, then what is the point?

And so the answer to the question ”Now what?” must be that now I let Him change me to be more like Him. I allow Him to change me to be more loving, more patient, gentler, kinder, less selfish.

I have already allowed Him to change me a great deal, but there is more that He can do in my heart and in how I think. On Good Friday, I nailed my sins to the cross, and Jesus desires for me to leave them there. To His cross I nailed fear, lack of trust, selfishness, anger, and unforgiveness. He desires that I move forward in my life with courage, trust, selflessness, understanding, and forgiveness.

So for me the next step I think needs to be to say, in the words of MercyMe, “So Long Self.”

The first time I heard this song I didn’t completely get it. But the more I spend time in God’s Word and in prayer, the more I express to Him a desire for the cross to really make a difference in my life, the more I understand what this song is all about.

I can’t go through life putting myself first. To be more like Christ, I must put others before myself. Just as Jesus laid down His life for my benefit, I must lay down my life for the benefit of others. This doesn’t mean that I must physically die for others (though some people are certainly called to do so), but it does mean I must set aside the selfish desire to improve only my own life and think of helping others. Sometimes that might mean giving up what society tells me are my rights, and it will often require me to trust that the spiritual blessings God will grant me as a result of my selflessness will far outweigh any material blessings I could gain by putting my desires first.

It will also require me to listen closely to the Holy Spirit and follow His advice and promptings. To truly say “so long” to my selfish nature, I must rely on Christ living in me.

My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I do not treat the grace of God as meaningless. For if keeping the law could make us right with God, then there was no need for Christ to die. Galatians 2:20-21 (NLT).

Christ died for me and you so that we may live free of sin and the law. He died so that we might be free to live according to His Spirit living in us.

Lent is over. Good Friday is history. Easter has come and gone. Now what will you do?

Salvation – A Poem

Last week one of my fellow bloggers commented on my poem titled “Forgiven” that she was thankful for salvation. I immediately knew that I had to write an acrostic poem using this word, because I am also thankful for the free gift of salvation that Jesus offers.

As I started writing this poem, I was reminded of my life before Jesus saved me. My life did not glorify my Creator. Because of my sin, I suffered a great deal of sorrow. It took me a long time to understand the sin behind my sorrow. But I am so thankful that while I was still living in my sinfulness, God offered me love and salvation. Looking back, I can see that the sorrow I experienced was a blessing because it caused me to seek my Savior.

For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death. 2 Corinthians 7:10 (NLT).

As I pondered what to include in this poem, I knew I couldn’t just write of the wonder of salvation. I had to also address our need for salvation. We all need a Savior, and Jesus died to fill that need. I also knew I needed to address the change that comes as a result of accepting the gift of salvation. It is a gift that changes the recipient to be more like the Giver.

Salvation

Sin and sorrow overwhelmed me, entangle my soul,
All of my thoughts opposed to God my creator, and then
Love came down from heaven and died on a cross.
Victory over my sin and sorrow, His blood made me whole;
At last I heard the Shepherd and found His sheep pen,
The King has made me clean, removed all the dross.
Imitating my Savior, His loving sacrifice, my new goal,
Opening my mouth I sing His praise, declare my faith, Amen!
Now I am free, His Spirit within assures salvation, not loss.

Do you know the Savior? Have you heard the Shepherd’s voice? Have you accepted the gift of salvation that will wash you clean? If not, what are you waiting for?

Our Light and Momentary Troubles

Yesterday I was the lay reader for our church, which means I got to read the first two scripture lessons for the day towards the beginning of the service. The second lesson for the day was 2 Corinthians 4:16-18:

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

I love these verses because they put this life in perspective. Lately I have been feeling weighed down by my troubles, by changes in my life that I have no control over and expectations that are going to take a lot of energy for me to meet. But Paul tells us that, in view of the resurrection, these troubles are “light and momentary!” Even without the resurrection, the troubles that are before me are not that bad, not as bad as what many are facing.

The Gospel lesson at church yesterday (read by our pastor) portrayed a “trouble” that was much greater than what is before me. We heard the story of Lazarus, the brother of Martha and Mary, found in John 11. Jesus loved Lazarus and his sisters, and yet when Jesus heard Lazarus was sick He did not immediately go to heal him. Instead, after Lazarus died, Jesus came to raise him from the dead so that the disciples would believe in a God for whom even death is a “light and momentary trouble.”

What is seen, including our troubles, are temporary. Things change. People come into our lives, and they leave just as quickly. Kids grow up. Pets get sick. Cars break down. Friends move away or just become too busy to keep in touch. We struggle with illness and death, financial reverses and financial gains, job changes, family relationships, and changes in the way we do church. All these things are temporary. To the extent they trouble us, those troubles are light and momentary.

But God, who is unseen, is eternal and unchanging. God was, is, and always will be a God of love and mercy, a God of justice and holiness, a God of grace and truth. For a short time this God was seen. As the Apostle John testified:

The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

From the fullness of his grace we have all received one blessing after another. For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. No one has ever seen God, but God the One and Only, who is at the Father’s side, has made him known. John 1:14, 16-18.

After Jesus made our Holy God known to us, He ascended into Heaven. Now He lives invisibly but powerfully in the hearts of those who put their trust in Him. His Spirit renews us day by day in the knowledge of Jesus’ death and resurrection for our sake. Because of this daily renewal, our troubles are light and momentary indeed!

I Fear No More

I was looking through one of my old journals today, reading some of the poetry I wrote long ago. Okay, it was in the mid-1990s, so not that long ago, but it seems an eternity. I read this poetry and am simply amazed at how God has changed me and my attitude since then. At that time, and for some time leading up to that, I was filled with fear and worry. I thought I would share some of those old poems. For those of you who know me now or who have read even a small part of this blog, you will see a stark difference between the woman I was and the woman I am now.

Words That Hide

Words are hiding in the ink
deep within my pen

Words are hiding in the dark
deep within my mind

I know they are there
because I see them when I try to sleep
They run around in circles
Playing their word games
And keeping me awake

But when the sun comes up
and I try to write them down
They hide again within my pen
and deep within my mind
In the dark within my mind

I know they want to come out and play
But they are afraid
At night in bed they feel safe
Playing in my mind

What will others think of them
If they play upon a page?
In lines and curves of black
Shining on the glaring white
It seems much safer just to hide
Within my pen
Within my mind
In the dark within my mind

Untitled

The me that no one knows
Writes poetry and prose

The me that people see
Writes briefs in legalese

The me that no one knows
Seeks counseling for my woes

The me that people see
Pretends I’m always pleased

There’s really only one of me
But different sides I reveal
Depending upon the circumstances
Or how I think I should feel

Oh, how God has changed me and taken away my fear! Now I do write poetry and prose on topics of interest to me and do not fear what others will think. Or if I do feel some fear, God gives me the courage to write anyway.

No longer to I pretend all is fine when it is not. But I also now know how to feel joy and happiness as well as sadness when it is warranted. God gave us a whole host of emotions. How I feel is no different from how others feel. The words about how I feel and what I believe no longer hide in my pen or in my mind.

I want to share one other poem that I wrote in 1996 about my son, who was 1 1/2 at the time. It is interesting how much the words I wrote about him then are still applicable today.  It was inspired, as I recall, by the fact that I used to sing him the song “You are my sunshine.”

My Son Shine

His smile is a thousand rays of sunshine
Shining brightly on a rainy day

His laugh is a hundred birds singing
Heralding the beauty of May

His dancing will make you smile and laugh
In its own very silly way

His curiosity rivals that of a hundred cats
You can see it clearly in his play

His temper is a howling hurricane
When he doesn’t get his own way

He is sweet and silly and stubborn and bold
He will be with us always I pray

Well, that’s enough poetry for one day. Maybe I’ll share more some other time.

I am just so grateful that God has given me the courage and strength to write this blog, to share the wonderful things He has done for me and the way He has changed me from the fearful woman I was once was to someone who is bold and ready to face the world with Jesus at my side. If you struggle with fear, cry out to Jesus to help you, to give you courage to be the person He has made you to be. “For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.” 2 Timothy 1:7.

Our Savior Understands Change

Changes in life are inevitable. Some happen so slowly, at an almost glacial pace, that we hardly notice. Others happen in the blink of an eye and leave us reeling from the shock. In times of change it is comforting to know that Jesus understands how we feel because He experienced that blink-of-an-eye kind of change in His earthly ministry.

Tomorrow is Palm Sunday. All four gospels record what is called the Triumphal Entry of Jesus. I like the way John records this happy event:

The next day the great crowd that had come for the Feast heard that Jesus was on his way to Jerusalem. They took palm branches and went out to meet him, shouting,
   ”Hosanna!”
   ”Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord!” 
   ”Blessed is the King of Israel!” John 12:12

The people were so excited to see Jesus come into Jerusalem. They loved Him and praised His name! He was called blessed.

But Good Friday is less than a week away. This is the day on which Jesus was beaten, spit upon, had a crown of thorns placed upon His bleeding head, was mocked, and was finally crucified. When Pilate, the Roman governor, tried to set Jesus free, having found Him to have done nothing worthy of death, the crowd had turned on Him.

It was the day of Preparation of Passover Week, about the sixth hour.

“Here is your king,” Pilate said to the Jews.

 But they shouted, “Take him away! Take him away! Crucify him!”
      ”Shall I crucify your king?” Pilate asked.
      ”We have no king but Caesar,” the chief priests answered.

 Finally Pilate handed him over to them to be crucified. John 19:14-16.

Talk about a change! In less than a week Jesus had gone from blessed to anathema in the eyes of the Jews and the Romans. I don’t know about you, but I know that Jesus experienced a change bigger than any I have ever known.

So one might wonder how Jesus dealt with such a devastating change. The answer is prayer. All of John 17 is the recorded prayer of Jesus for Himself, for His disciples, and for all believers. Before His arrest, Jesus went to pray in the garden of Gethsemane.

They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus said to his disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,” he said to them. “Stay here and keep watch.”

Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him. “Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” Mark 14:32-36.

When faced with a huge change in how the people would treat Him, Jesus prayed. He asked that this change not occur if possible, but ultimately He prayed that the Father’s will be done. He trusted God’s plan in the change. I know Jesus had an advantage because He was God incarnate and was closely in tune with the Father at all times. We let life get in the way and don’t always (or maybe even seldom) stay in tune with our Father in Heaven. But if Jesus could trust in God’s plan in the face of His own crucifixion, surely we can trust His plan in the changes that take place in our lives.

Can you trust in God’s plan today? I think I’m going to try, and realizing Jesus understands how I feel during all the changes in my life helps.

Change Happens

Change can be very hard work and sometimes painful. But often the work and pain are worth the result following the change. I was reminded of that today as I thought back on a big change in my life that occurred 15 years ago. That was the day my son was born. That change from being pregnant to holding a little boy in my arms took a lot of hard work and pain. But the result was well worth it.

Thousands of changes later, I now have a wonderful son who is growing into a sweet, compassionate young man who loves God and is so thoughtful toward others. And it was worth all of the hard work and pain.

Recently, my department has been going through some changes at work, and there are more and bigger changes to come. They will require a lot of hard work, and maybe even a little bit of pain. But I think the end result will be well worth the effort. I’ve come to realize that it may well allow us to be more productive and better fulfill our mission within the organization.

There is another change that all Christians experience. The apostle Paul put it this way: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” 2 Corinthians 5:17. Jesus referred to our change to a new creation as being born again. John 3. It is the process by which God takes a sinner and through the power of the Holy Spirit transforms him or her into a child of God. The initial transformation can actually seem fairly easy, though for some accepting this change can be difficult and painful.

The really hard and sometimes painful part comes in the days, weeks, and years after the initial transformation. As Max Lucado has said, God loves us just the way we are, but He doesn’t want to leave us that way. He wants to make us just like Jesus. Once a person is born again, the Holy Spirit begins to work on change the new Christian into something better. The Christian band Third Day has a song called “This Is Who I Am” that makes this point quite well:

I’m a son of a good man
I’m the child of an angel
I’m the brother of a wild one
And I’m looking for direction
I’m the lover of a beauty
I’m the father of blessings
I’m a singer of a love song
But is that all I’m good for

This is who I am
This is who I am
So take me and make me something so much more
This is who I am
This is who I am
So change me and make me someone better than before

I’m a saint and a sinner
I’m a lover and a fighter
I’m a true believer, with great desire
I’m a preacher of grace, prophet of love, teacher of truth
I’ve fallen down so many times
But here I stand in front of you

Take me as I am
But please don’t leave me that way
‘Cause I know that you can make me better than I am today

I am a work in progress and God is changing me and my environment day by day. For that I am grateful. I know that God can make me better than I am today.